words and phobias

WORDS THAT DON'T EXIST BUT SHOULD

1. Aquadextrous (akwa deks' trus) adj. Possessing the ability
to turn the bathtub faucet on and off with your toes.

2. Carperpetuation (kar 'pur pet u a shun) n. The act, when
vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least
a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it,
then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance.

3. Disconfect (diskonfect') v. To sterilize the piece of candy
you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming that somehow
it will 'remove' all the germs.

4. Elbonics (el bon' iks) n. The actions of two people
maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.

5. Frust (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to be
swept onto the dustpan and keeps backing a person across the
room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the
rug.

6. Lactomangulation (lak' to man gyu lay' shun) n. Manhandling
the 'open here' spout on a milk container so badly that one has
to resort to the 'illegal' side.


7. Phonesia (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone
number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.

8. Pupkus (pup' kus) n. The moist residue left on a window
after a dog presses its nose to it.

9. Telecrastination (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of
always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick
it up, even when you're only six inches away.

Think you have a phobia, scroll down on this page of the Phobialist